TORAHsHARED

Monday, August 8, 2011

Why Cry?

9 av 5771

Tisha b’av

Why cry?

The truth is.. It’s hard to cry when you know you’re supposed to. When you are sitting in a room with a lot of people and feel like you have to cry but don’t want people to see that’s when the tears come rushing through.. It always happens like that. But on 9av, we can still be in a room with so many people who might actually be crying, but why can’t we bring ourselves to cry? Why didn’t I cry tonight?

I guess the fact that I didn’t should be a reason in and of itself to shed some tears. A really long time ago we had a beautiful stunning holy place where Hashem Himself rested. It was almost as if you were stuck in that moment of clarity you have when your saying shema yisroel for the last time on yom kipper all the time. That clarity, that closeness, was there and so clear, so evident. We became comfortable, too comfortable and relaxed. We became lax in our mitzvos, in our avodas Hashem..we stopped going to the bais hamikdash on the shalosh regalim, we stopped being nice to each other we stopped being the people that made us special. Our ahavas yisroel was going down the drain and every sin we did was paid for. With every step in the wrong direction we lit a small flame that eventually burnt down our beautiful bayis. Without that source of light shining onto the world and us we were put into a whole of darkness. What any normal person would do when they are thrown into a pit is to try and get out but no.. Not klal yisroel… we decided to just make a little home here inside this chalal- this void this empty space of darkness. We just made ourselves comfortable here… we made it nice and cozy.. But what we don’t realize is that ITS STILL A DARK PIT.. No matter how much u try to make a dirty disgusting whole your home by cleaning up the dirt and hanging up some nice leaves—it will never be anything like you true home.. But I guess after a while..After so many years, your memory of what home sweet home is begins to fade and all you can remember is this pit, being in this pit, this whole, and this cold cave without light. Kind of like that whole that samara was thrown into in that movie the ring… yikes…lo alenu.. But umm we have turned galus into a “beautiful” place.. We made big homes and hung up fancy pictures we go for lunch instead of going to bring karbanos we go on vacation to Europe instead of trekking to the bais hamikdash to bring bikurim we have bar mitzvahs in clubs with mixed dancing instead of boys being SO excited to be chayev mitzvos learning torah with their fathers in its honor… were really making this whole quite nice.. But no matter what… no matter how long we camp out here we can never forget the warmth and comfort of the courtyard we gave our hearts to Hashem in.. We cant forget the holy face of the kohen gadol when he walks inside the kodesh kedashim we cant forget these things or else well lose owner ship there is a gemara that talks about returning lost objects… one who finds a lost object is chayev to return it to its owner in the case where the owner has lost hope of finding this lost item the finder can keep it… we must not give up hope of finding our bayis because when and if chas v’shalom we do…we will lose ownership over the holiest matana Hashem will ever ever ever give to us ever.

If it hard to cry today, just think about how sad it is that we became so comfortable, so lax. People don’t even remember their bayis anymore… today… Jews are NOT marrying Jews, Jews are NOT keeping kosher, NOT keeping shabbos- literally flicking off and on the lights, getting in their cars, going to concerts ON SHABBOS, the day that is meant for just us and Hashem. Just imagine a husband and wife having an anniversary, the husband goes out buys her favorite red roses, cooks a special dinner get nice table cloth and nice silverware all for his wife to show his love, he cancels all his appointments shuts off his phone and wants to give his wife all his attention and what does she do? She comes home tells her husband “um what’s that? I like daisies” says “oh sorry I already ate dinner- no thanks” tells him how he doesn’t have good taste because that tablecloth is horrible looking makes a manicure appointment and leaves while talking on the phone to a friend. Could u imagine the chutzpah and this is kivyochel what we have today… we have a broken relationship with the husband that only tried to give to us. Hashem only tries to give to us- this world was made for us and how do we repay Hashem? By disgracing His Holiness its pashut not the way to live we cant do this anymore. We have to reach out we need to help people we need to care … this is the reason we should cry.. We should cry because Jews hurt each other today, we should cry because Leiby, a beautiful child had such emunah to trust a yid, and that yid was not trustworthy to say the LEAST… leiby that amazing unbelievable little boy, that yidden with yiras shamayim dream of having, his rebbeim said he had so much kavana when he davened- what nachas his parents must have had from him! And he was taken from us from one of our own people- what darkness we live in.. It’s a dark whole and we must not stay comfortable here.

We should cry because we see first hand people who don’t keep shabbos.. That while people sing lecha dodi with full hearts others are watching the baseball game, that while we bow “boee kallah boee kallah” other people are bowing down to basketball players and rap singers and these people are our brothers.. What’s even worse is that even when we throw emes in their face they don’t know its emes.. They turn away.. They don’t want to know… what could be worse than watching the people you love most throw their lives away? By wasting time focusing on such gashmiyus by getting such pleasure from the most fleeting things… the hardest part is that after 120 Hashem is going to say what happened? What did u make of yourself… what they’ll see is what they could have been and what they were- the distance between the two will be far too great- too much to bear and their neshamos will say please one more chance at shleimus… but at that point its too late that shame.. That’s gehenom…

We have to cry over these things.. Cry over these matzavim and we have to try our best to strengthen our own mitzvos because as rav dessler says SO beautifully “ what comes from the heart penetrates the heart”… maybe if we all work on our penimyus and do our mitzvos with heart it will somehow capture the neshamos that are far away… its kind of like cutting diamonds with diamonds.. the only way to bring back a neshama is with neshama be honest, let your words be true and real to you.. And maybe that’s how well start bringing Jews back and when they come back we would have formed a relationship a close one if its done with this sense of heart and emotion and with each POSITIVE action we take in the right direction we can start to rebuild .. We can build a latter that’ll take us out of our dark whole in the ground.. back to the light back to the bais Hamikdash back to Hashem…….

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Understanding the power of the Tisha B’Av fast- AISH.COM

Fasting is difficult. Most of us look forward to a juicy burger or gourmet ice cream, but not too many people I know look forward to a fast. So it’s been bothering me: Why is fasting a mitzvah? There must be some inherent spiritual lift behind it, otherwise it would not be part of Jewish life.

Recently, I’ve been reading A God Powered Life by Rabbi David Aaron. One chapter on the Kabbalistic concept of tzimtzum, constriction, opened up a revelation for me and helped me understand the power of fasting. He writes:

The Kabbalah teaches that before creation there was just the endless Light of God... God, however, contracted His endless light and withdrew it, moved Himself away from the center while making a space for the creation of vessels. [Vessels refer to time, space, matter, you and me.] God then projected a thin ray of His endless light into the vessels. This process of making a space and infusing every moment, every place and every one with the Presence of the Great I is the mystery and miracle of tzimtzum[constriction].
We, too, must perform this divine act in the service of God. First we have to move everything out of the way, get rid of the racket, and then we must bracket this moment and this place.

This struck a real chord in me. When God condensed Himself to focus His Light in a way that we could receive it, it was the ultimate act of love. God is Everything, but we couldn’t benefit from His greatness if it was in the full expansive state.

No matter what a wonderful friend or teacher I am, no matter how talented or productive I am, my child won’t respond to the sum of me. She can only have all of me if I condense myself, if I create a space and focus all of my love, kindness and gifts onto her. Nothing I do for the rest of the world will translate to love for her with that same power.

This is the real challenge of parenting and relationships. A part of us doesn’t want to stop. We want to move and create. Pulling back and committing to the moment takes a lot of energy.

But that’s precisely where the energy is. Tzimtzum: constriction for expansiveness.

Sitting on the Floor

Which brings us to the idea of fasting. In Hebrew a fast is called a tzom, similar to the word tzimtzum. When we fast, we feel anything but expansive. We feel hungry and restless; we can’t even think of plans beyond the next moment. Fasting narrows our world to the immediate present.

But where is the light, the benefit? What purpose could a full day of constriction have?

In sorrow is where we find comfort.

The constrictive experience of fasting is similar to a state of mourning. A person sitting shiva needs to stay with the process of grieving for seven days. They’re instructed to dwell with their sorrow. And yet, paradoxically, that is where they find comfort. The loss hurts, and the pain is intense. But in being with it, there is comfort in the discomfort.

In some mysterious way, our constriction mimics God’s constriction. We can relish every bit of life – whether feasting or fasting – in its most expansive way.

Fasting for a whole day allows us to condense ourselves into the experience. There we find that our Jewish world is not narrow at all. It is a vast and beautiful, complex story with a 4,000-year-old chain of steel. It is an adventure of growth and yearning. It’s a relationship with God and His Torah and His Land, and the realization that God, Torah and the Jewish people are all One.

On Tisha B'Av, sitting on the floor in mourning, is a transformational odyssey where we’re flung back and forth to our pains past and present, while all the time holding the glorious image of the future. Our joined hunger parallels the lack we feel. On this day we feel not only for ourselves, but for all the Jewish people; knowing with a knowledge as real as the hunger in our belly that we are collectively famished for connection, weak from struggle, and heavy from the pain of a fractured people.

Yes, all this is born in the place where we’re willing to constrict.

And when Tisha B'Av is over, it is just the beginning. We use tzimtzum to bring that power of unity to a deeper level.

What would it mean to the next person you spoke to if you looked them in the eye and listened to them fully without distraction?

Everything.

How would your spouse feel if you put down what you’re holding and quieted your mind to make space for their words?

Loved. Cherished. Supported.

Tzimtzum is another way of saying: “You matter enough for me to focus all my energies on you.”

This Tisha B'Av, may we have the courage to be fully with the tzom, whole with the discomfort, and learn to condense our entirety for every other Jew.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

On Tisha B'Av I can feel the weight of thousands of years of “if onlys.”

For the past few weeks I have been walking around in a daze. The terrible tragedy of Leiby Kletzky’s death feels like a constant loss wherever I turn. Last Shabbos a neighbor’s nine-year-old boy came to pick up his little sister from our house. And he looked exactly like the picture of Leiby. I felt tears spring suddenly to my eyes. Not on Shabbos, I warned myself. Do not cry on Shabbos in front of all of your children while you are serving dessert. But I felt like I was choking, like my heart was in my throat. Like I could feel somehow another mother’s heart shattering across the ocean. And I couldn’t stop thinking about it.

I don't know why. Usually it takes me a day or two to digest an awful story in the news. Sometimes it only takes me an hour, or just a few minutes. But these past few weeks have been different for some reason. Maybe because I have children that are around Leiby’s age. Maybe because I worry when my children are even a minute late, and I can so readily feel the agony of a mother whose child will never come home.

But what is taking my breath away lately is how the summer sun can still shine in the shadow of such loss. I cannot comprehend it. How can the sky be such a startling shade of blue on a morning like this? How can the branches of the olive tree reach so majestically upwards, cradling tiny, colorful birds who continue to sing as if no one is crying? As if a nation’s heart isn’t broken? As if a child has not just disappeared forever? How could the world just continue this way with its stunning sunsets and dawns full of hope?

I wanted the sky to turn black, for a storm to surround us for just a moment so that the loss would be mirrored back to us. How could we all just go on?

And then I got stuck in the "if onlys." It was a futile attempt to try to turn back time. If only Leiby wouldn't have gone to camp that day. If only he wouldn't have had a dentist appointment. If only he had asked someone else for directions. If only someone would have found a way to rescue him. If only we could have somehow heard him before all was lost. If only his death hadn't been so gruesome…

Monday, August 1, 2011

AmazingAarticle from Aish.com

Getting from the house to school in the morning – or rather the two schools that my youngest sons attend – always takes a while. Shmuel, like a seven-year-old version of the English poet, William Wordsworth, stops to marvel at the wonders of nature; while Pinhas, five, comports himself like a young Isaac Newton, pausing to consider how things work. Today, a garbage pick-up fired both of their imaginations. Shmuel seemed to be readying a sonnet; Pinhas an engineering diagram. Yes, getting to school takes a long time.

Between the flights of sublimity and the mechanical inquiries, I pursue another topic, “How to Cross the Street.” First, an undergraduate course in semiotics: “What do the thick white lines on the pavement mean?” “What does the blue and white illuminated image of the pedestrian represent?” “Yes, this is the place to cross the street!”

So we stand and dutifully wait. One car zooms by; and then another. A young father, with an mp3 player – probably listening to a lecture – his five-year-old daughter in tow, crosses down the block, away from the pedestrian crossing. I see Pinhas wondering: What exactly is abba trying to pass off on us? “You don’t have to cross here,” he finally affirms, another car whizzing by: “Look at them.” He points to his father and daughter still in sight and already at the grocery store across the street, poised to buy a white roll and chocolate milk.

Shmuel and Pinhas

I preempt the request I know is coming. “No, you can’t havelakhmania and choco, Mommy packed you a lunch.” And: “Just because other people do the wrong thing does not mean that it’s right.” Finally, a car stops, the driver waving us across benevolently. I nod in gratitude – in Israel, traffic regulations are often viewed as suggestions – “Thank you for abiding by the law.”

Pinhas is first to school today. Shmuel, sometimes shy, is reticent to accompany us, so he waits outside the school gates. A group of boys, pushing their heads through the metal bars, starts to tease him, even as I stand by: “You guys have a problem?” I ask, mimicking what boys typically say when taunting Shmuel, who has Down Syndrome. When I come back, Shmuel is still standing there. He looks confused, a departure from his wondrous happy, friendly self: one of the boys is standing with his tongue hanging out with a mocking stare.

When I return home, my wife asks: “What do you expect?” This was one of the schools that would not take Shmuel; why should we expect more from children than their teachers? Or, a principal who had told us – he has a niece with Down Syndrome, so he assured us, “I know” – that “mainstreaming is not good for special children.” Besides, he added, “it would give the school a bad name.”

We instinctively hate the other for reminding us of the “defect” which is our own.

The Torah enjoins, “Love your neighbor as yourself,” and in the same chapter of Leviticus, “You shall love the stranger.” Love the one with whom you identify, as well as the one who seems different from you. Rashi, the eleventh-century commentator who guides generations through difficult passages, writes that the Torah assumes one may come to hate the stranger because he has a “defect.” His deficiency, whatever it may be, arouses a desire to afflict him, or at least distance him.

But the verse continues: “You yourself were once strangers in the land of Egypt.” You see him as different, but he is just like you. The stranger’s so-called defect, Rashi writes, is your own. That characteristic which we are unable to acknowledge – too painful or unpleasant – we externalize in a hatred for others. We were once slaves in Egypt, “strangers in a strange land,” immersed in idolatry. So, we look at the stranger and project upon him that which we fear might be most true about ourselves. But we fear it – this is the Torah’s insight – because it is true. We instinctively hate the other for reminding us of the “defect” which is our own.

The answer to the question opening Hamlet – “Who’s there?” – is never simply answered. We have a natural propensity, the Torah tells us, to be in denial about our selves, but also to project onto others the perceived shortcomings from which we most want to escape. We hate the thing which – in a way we cannot yet face – helps to define who we are. Jewish prayer and ritual, as a corrective to those inclinations, refer to the God who took the Jewish people out of Egypt, not the God Who created the heavens and the earth, emphasizing: “Remember who you are, remember from where you came.” Your past – and you – are also exceptional. The verse concludes: “I am your God” – Rashi explains, both your God and the stranger’s. You are not only united in your history; you and the stranger, who you want to distance from the camp, have the same God. So be open-minded to the stranger within.

We may have more in common with children of difference, like Shmuel, than we are willing to admit.

In the end, we may have more in common with children of difference, like Shmuel, than we are willing to admit. The school principal’s protests about mainstreaming may reveal as much about his own personal insecurities – one is not always efficient, brilliant, and scholarly – as about purported concerns for the “name” of the school. The proximity of children with Down Syndrome, or exceptional children of any kind, make us uneasy about the ways in which we may also be merely ordinary, less than competent, imperfect. How else to explain a school – or a community – that wants to project an image of perfection in order to maintain its good name?

But that image is a communal fantasy, not the Torah’s ideal. Keeping special children out of the “mainstream” may be, in many cases, the right thing. But sometimes, it is as much about parents – or uncles – who nurture images of themselves helping them to forget what they do not want to know. As far as myself, I have a lot to learn from the indefatigably questioning and studious Pinhas, but probably even more from my more bashful Shmuel, who takes in the world in awe, and who laughs and dances with unselfconscious glee and abandonment. The stranger we try to flee almost always has an uncannily familiar face. But becoming more tolerant to that which is more singular in ourselves – acknowledging the stranger within – makes it easier to be tolerant of the exceptional in others.

Back on the morning trek to school, walking in the direction of Shmuel’s school now, we encounter the bouncy-gait of the nine-year-old Yehuda: “Good morning Shmuel!” Shortly after, a smiling boy on a bicycle, and an exuberant “Shalom Shmuel!” “He is my friend,” Shmuel boasts loudly. And then the gawky eleven-year-old from down the block, who keeps a rooster in our building courtyard, volunteers, “Can I walk with Shmuel to heder?” We are grateful to the school principal who declared, “It’s a big mitzvah” to accept Shmuel into the school. But the children in Shmuel’s school, like his brothers and sisters, perhaps benefit most in learning to take for granted – instead of taking exceptional at – including Shmuel in their play. For from a very early age, children notice the exceptions we make, and turn them into second nature, whether crossing the street in the wrong place or making a new friend, even though he may be a bit different.

Sunday, July 31, 2011

inspiring article!

Shmuel and Pinhas

We instinctively hate the other for reminding us of the “defect” which is our own.

We may have more in common with children of difference, like Shmuel, than we are willing to admit.

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Ahavas Yisroel At Its Best

http://www.aish.com/jw/id/Avichais_Story.html

"Olam Chessed Y'baneh"

Hashem created this world for the purpose of chessed. Hashem created the world specifically for us to be the ones who receive Hashem's chessed.. All Hashem wants to do is give to us but what is the most beautiful thing we can do besides for just appreciating the chessed Hashem does for us is to emulate that attribute of being a Noten, a giver, and give to our brothers and sisters.

This story of Avichai and Ziv is what it means to be a true giver. Ziv knew that this little boy wasn’t going to repay him.. Ziv gave to him purely for the sake of giving... he wanted to make another Jew happy, to save a neshama.. He took initiative when others did not and utilized what Hashem gave him. Going into the 3 Weeks, we should introspect and think about how we can all become givers in our own ways just like Ziv gave. We all have special kochos that Hashem gave SPECIFICALLY to us that no one else has and we have a responsibility to utilize those kochos and what better way to utilize them in the way we think Hashem would Himself? We should utilize our kochos by giving to each other We should emulate Hashem, Rav Dessler says that through giving we learn to love... maybe if we all gave a little piece of ourselves we'd learn to love our fellow Jews more and through that ahavas yisroel we will rebuild the bais HaMikdash, stone by precious stone, and merit to see it in all of its glory b'mhaira byameinu amen

quote from mevakesh lev- rav ehrmans blog

All change is painful because it involves letting go of what we hold dear.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Letter from the Yetzer Hara

A LETTER FROM THE YETZER HARAH

this is a great thing to have in mind always, but especially during rough times.

To my star pupil,
I am writing this letter to let you know what I think of you. Up here in heaven things are not like they are down on Earth. Over there, people only know what they can see. If they see a person is "successful", they think that he is the greatest guy. When they see somebody struggling, they think he might be one of the weaker elements.
Let me tell you something. Hashem gives every person certain abilities that nobody knows about down where you live. Some people are capable of tremendous things, while others were put there for much smaller purposes. Only Hashem in His infinite wisdom is able to give every person exactly what he needs, to reach his potential.
I am very misunderstood. Most people hate me, and I don't really blame them. Most people think that my job is to make sure that they fail in all aspects of Mitzvos, and that I rejoice every time they sin. This is the furthest thing from the truth. Did you ever watch a boxing coach train his student? It is really a funny sight. The coach will put on gloves, and fight against his student. At first, he won't hit him so hard, or throw his best punches. But, as the student gets better and better, the coach will start to fight him harder and harder. He does this so that the student will improve his skills, and become the best boxer he can be. This is where it gets strange. Every time the coach knocks down the student, the student gets yelled at!! But finally, when the coach threw everything he has at his student, and not only does he withstand the beating, but he knocks the coach down, there is nobody in the world happier then the coach himself!
This is exactly how I feel. If you fail right away, and don't even try to fight back, I see that there is not much talent to work with, and so I take it easy on you. But if you get back up swinging, I realize that I may have a real winner here, and so I start to intensify the beating. With every level that you go up, I increase the intensity of the fight. If you finally deal me a blow that knocks me out, I will get up and embrace you and rejoice with your success.
Sometimes my job is very disappointing I see a person with a lot of potential and I start right in on him. He fights back for a while, but when the fight gets too tough, he quits and just remains on whatever level he was on. (And he usually ends up going down!) I feel like yelling at him, "Get up you fool! Do you have any idea how much more you could be accomplishing?!" But I am not allowed to do so. I just leave him alone, and go try to find another promising candidate.
If I have chosen you to be the target of my more fierce battles, it was not for no reason! You have tremendous ability! You were born into a very special family, you have Rabbeim who really care about you, and parents who would help you grow in Torah and Mitzvos. You are a very respectful and kind person.
I am writing to you now, because I have a very serious request to ask of you. Please don't step fighting! Don't give up! I have been beating too many people lately, and I am losing patience, Believe in yourself, because I would not be involved with you as much as I am if I didn't think you could beat me. Know what your strengths are! A great Rabbi once said: "Woe is to he who doesn't know his weaknesses. But, 'Oy Vavoy' to him who doesn't know his strengths - for he will not have anything with which to fight."
Always remember one thing: you have a secret weapon at your disposal. I shouldn't really be telling you - but I will anyway. Hashem himself is watching our "training" sessions very closely. I'm pleased to inform you that He's rooting for you! If things should ever get tough, almost too tough to bear, just callout to Him with a prayer, and He will immediately come to your aid. I wish you the best of luck, and I hope that after 120 years when your time is up in that world of falsehood, you will come up here to the world of truth, where I will be waiting for you with open arms, to congratulate you on your victory, and personally escort you to your place next to the Kisey HaKavod.

Sincerely, and with great admiration I remain,
Your Yetzer Hara

Monday, July 4, 2011

There is someone who is commenting and the emails are going to torahshared@gmail.com asking for a certain comment to be deleted. I went through the entire site and cant find it. Please email torahshared@gmail.com exactly what your asking for :)

The G-d of Large and SMALL

I was driving northbound on Hamilton Ave. en route to the Brooklyn Battery Tunnel. I've taken the route hundreds of times. But instead of veering left into the lane for the tunnel, I decided to swerve right – into the lane headed for the Brooklyn Bridge. And there he was.

“Okay buddy, pull over here,” he seemed to be saying with his dramatic hand movements. He was short for a cop; a bit stocky, and very animated.

“License, registration and insurance card,” he demanded.

I do not enjoy being pulled over by a law enforcement officer. It falls somewhere between toenail fungus and sea sickness on my “Must Experience” list. I’m not sure if I attempted some lame, incoherent muttering explaining why I crossed that dreaded SOLID WHITE LINE, but I am sure that it made no impact on Officer Stankowski.

“The instructions are on the back,” he kindly informed me while handing me the yellow summons. “Have a nice day.”

I got out of the car and took pictures of the crime scene area. I had no idea why I was doing it.

During the five minutes or so that he took to write the ticket, I got out of the car and took pictures of the pavement markings and signs posted in the crime scene area. It was something I had seen others do, but never done before myself. I had no idea why I was doing it, but it seemed like my only way to express my innocence to Stankowski. “If I’m taking pictures, then I MUST not be guilty.” Don’t worry. It made no sense to me either.

In the ensuing months I made the usual inquiries of friends, some of them attorneys, to help craft and strategize my approach to the infraction. One avenue was clearly consensual: “Push this off as long as you can. You never know what could happen.”

Police officers move out of town, get transferred, or run for District Attorney or other such positions all the time.
Maybe the law will change.
Nuclear war could beckon.

Dutifully, I cooperated. Nearly a full year went past, but, my luck, the World remained at relative peace. That meant that April 8^th was D-Day.

My Secret Weapon

The sun shone brightly that Friday morning. I trimmed the beard and chose a dark tie. Stomach in flutters, I skipped breakfast. I drove (very carefully) to the courthouse and saw my name on the hearing ledger taped to the wall next to Room 5. The paint was peeling. There was no smell. I was early. I’m never early.

I guess a lot of people were early, as most of the seats were already occupied by my fellow defendants. They peered at me as I walked in. They knew I was innocent, as much as I knew the same about them. It’s like a club, these hearing rooms, with new members joining every few hours. “It’s us against the cops. How dare they pronounce us guilty until proven innocent! It’s anti-American. We will band together and we WILL defeat them!”

Right.

In walked the enemy. A group of six or seven uniformed officers in full regalia – as if they were actually setting out to real combat. It seemed unfair. Stankowski, in knee-high boots, oversized revolver, gleaming badges and medals, and perfectly pressed slacks versus Salomon…in the dark tie.

But unbeknownst to the prosecution, Salomon had brought a secret weapon– a manila envelope containing copies of Section 3A.01 of the MUTCD. Not familiar with the Manual on Uniform Traffic Control Devices? Neither was I, until my research uncovered that the “Bible” of Traffic Law indicated that (read carefully), “A SOLID line usually indicates that crossing the line is discouraged.It goes on to explain that there are actually different widths of solid lines that suggest different levels of restriction. And, according to the pictures that I (so brilliantly) took, that solid line that I crossed could have been construed as very crossable, thank you.

The first case involved a woman charged with driving while talking on her cell phone. She totally denied it – patently and emphatically. It was basically her word against the cop.

“Guilty as charged!” bellowed the judge. “One hundred and forty dollars plus two points on your license. No appeals allowed. See the clerk. Next!”

A pall fell over the gallery. The club members were distraught. How was that justified?

The next brother was called. Unsafe lane change was his alleged violation. The arguments were spirited on both sides, with my new comrade making a strong case for how the traffic pattern demanded that he switch lanes at that time.

“Guilty as charged!” bellowed the judge. “One hundred and forty dollars plus two points on your license. No appeals allowed. See the clerk. Next!”

At this point I was happy that I had skipped breakfast, as a dour sensation of sudden nausea invaded my digestive tract. I held on to my manila envelope extra tight, but began to question its potential influence.

Two more sisters followed – both with cell phone violations issued by different officers. The verdicts were of similar ilk. They shuffled out of the courtroom pale, with heads bowed and wallets opened. (One of the sisters also had a manila envelope.)

I started feeling a bit light-headed and a slight quiver emerged on my bottom lip.

Wow, I thought, I am really nervous about this thing. How absurd is that?

I found myself in touch with my deepening tension and anxiety and I began to feel…well… embarrassed.

What’s the big deal? It’s only a traffic ticket! And just because you already have two points on your license, that’s a reason to panic? Nausea? Quiver? IT’S ONLY TRAFFIC COURT, FOR HEAVEN’S SAKE!

Stankowski – even in his boots – was no match for the Almighty.

And then, instinctively, I actually began to pray – yes…pray. I said some Psalms by heart and spoke to God – asking for his intervention. Stankowski – even in his boots – was no match for the Almighty, I reasoned.

The gallery was slowly starting to empty. The next victim…er…accused, was an older gentleman. He looked so sweet and yes, innocent. I couldn’t hear too many of the details, but one part came through loud and clear.

“Guilty as charged! One hundred and forty dollars plus two points on your license. No appeals allowed. See the clerk. Next!”

That thud you heard was the lump that egressed in my larynx.

Now I was sweating and intensifying my prayers. It was clear to me that without some kind of supernal assistance I would be on line at the cashier in just a few minutes. But as my entreaties were compounding, so too was my shame.

This is what you pray for? This? Do you think God has time for such trivialities?World hunger, terrorism, apostasy, apathy, disease, abuse are all rampant. And you’re worried about two points on your license and a few dollars? What has gotten into you??

What kind of self-respecting person would feel compelled by terror in Traffic Court to pray to God for salvation? But, on the other hand, just as there is no such thing as “too big” for God, there is no concept of “too small” either. It’s not as if God is too tied up with the really important stuff, so He can't attend to the trifle details of our lives. That would imply human-like restriction to the All Powerful.

The same way we make a blessing on a 32 oz. filet mignon, we also recite a blessing before a tiny cup of water. In fact, it is actually the very same blessing that we make on both. My praying to Him when serious illness crosses my earshot in no way precludes my praying when Stankowski looms before me.

Armed with my new artillery, I clutched that manila envelope ever so snugly, closed my eyes, and freely asked God for help.

Seconds later we stood before the judge. A surprising calm descended. The nausea was gone. My voice trembled just a bit when I pleaded, “Not guilty,” but I felt ready to accept His decision. I looked to my right. There stood Stankowski. He was ruffling through his papers.

The judge asked if he was ready to proceed. Stankowski continued to ruffle. Now his feet were shuffling too. I thought I detected a bead of sweat or perhaps a hair skid out of place.

“Officer Stankowski – are you ready to proceed?”

Silence. Now he was shaking his head. A couple of summonses fell to the floor. He bent down to retrieve them.

“Your honor, I…er…I cannot seem to locate the ticket or my notes on this case.

I thought my legs were going to leave their sockets.

“If you cannot proceed, I will have no choice but to dismiss these charges.”

Stankowski was done and he knew it. He pretended to continue his search for the missing documents, but it was to no avail.

“I’m sorry. I cannot find anything on this violation.”

“All right then. Let the record state that I am entering a verdict of ‘Not guilty.’ No points or fine are assessed. You are free to go.”

I thanked the judge and wobbled away.

On the way out, I did three things. First, I glanced over at the remaining fraternity members and smiled. They gave me lots of thumbs up and lots of smiles. One brother pointed to heaven…really.

Second, I said a prayer of thanks. I apologized for my overreaction, but acknowledged that He is truly the God of large and small.

And finally, I tossed that manila envelope in the trash bin.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Shiur Wednesday Night

There will be a shiur for women this wed. night [it is a segulah to have a "wed." soon:)] at 9:10pm at 115 Central Park West 72nd street apt. 9b.

Admission: A smile. If you can't pay at the door you will probably pay at some point during the shiur.

Blessings:)!

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

written by yosef shiminov

YOUR WAY, MY WAY, AND THE HIGHWAY

This Tuesday night we celebrate the holiday of Shavuot, the day Hashem gave us the Torah as a gift. It was a miraculous day, a day when G-d spoke directly to all the Jewish people at once. The day when we Jews proclaimed "WE WILL DO AND WE SHALL LISTEN" to all of G-d's 613 commandments. The day G-d crowned us and called us his chosen people, a light upon the nations.

The Torah was given to us to be our guide in life, to direct us and teach us the proper way in life in order for us to attain a good life in this world and the world to come. As is well known everything that a person does in life no matter how mundane could be considered a Mitzvah if done with the proper intentions. Likewise every person is unique and each person has certain talents that others do not possess, and everyone can use their own special abilities in their service of G-d.

Unfortunately, today many Jews think they must follow one rigid path in order to do what is proper in the eyes of G-d. Rabbi Yaakov Kamentzkey related when talking about how Yeshiva Torah Vodaath was different and greater than most Yeshivas, "most Yeshivas are like a bed in Sodom", they try to make you fit the bed, they try to mold you, they want everyone to be the same, walk the same, talk the same and just do everything the same. But this is not what G-d wants, we see this from the fact that on the first Shavuot G-d spoke to each and every Jew directly and therefore expects each and every Jew to use their special talents when serving G-d. It is as if there are many paths that lead to the same one goal, the goal of becoming a better person, and becoming holier Jew by drawing closer to G-d. This is possibly what King Shlomo meant when he wrote in Mishelay (the Book of Proverbs 3:17) "All its [Torah] ways are pleasant and all its paths are peace". That all the paths that are used to serve G-d are great, as long as it is consistent with Halachah (Jewish Law) and authentic Tradition.

In the first Mishnah of the second chapter of Ethics of our Fathers Rabbe (Rabbi Judah HaNasi, redactor and editor of all the Mishnayot) states "Which is the proper path that a person should choose for himself? Whatever [path] is a credit to himself and earns him esteem of fellow men." Based on this Rabbi Simcha Bunim of P'shis'cha would emphasize that people should maintain their own individuality while defining their way of serving G-d; merely to imitate others is a grave error. G-d invests every individual with a unique set of abilities, talents, and faults, and it is with these that G-d wants him to serve him. Because Rabbe could have simply said "The proper path is to adhere to the Torah and the Mitzvot" but instead Rabbe says to choose a path that "is a credit to himself" a path that is unique to the individual.

But let us also not forget to respect the pathways of others. The Midrash states: Just as one persons facial features are different from another person, so do people's ideas differ (Tanchuma; Pinchas 10). Just as one cannot be upset with another for having a nose that is different than his, so to one must respect the opinions of others. This concept is also reflected in this Mishnah as it says "and earns him esteem of fellow men" since by respecting others he is also gets respected. We must never fault legitimate choices of other just because it is different than what we do. As long as it is consistent with Halachah (Jewish Law) and authentic Tradition, it may and should, reflect the individuality of its practitioner.

It is well known that the second Temple was destroyed because gratuitous hatred was rampant in society. But hopefully this year when we understand and accept other peoples Kosher Paths to G-d, and we can rectify the hatred with love for our fellow Jews, Mashiach will come and establish the Third and final Temple in Jerusalem.

Chizuk for the day. Aish.com

Blessed are You, Hashem, our God, King of the Universe ... (Siddur)

Many times each day, we recite various blessings to remind ourselves that God is King of the Universe.
While a person may be tempted to do things that defy the Divine will, the Baal Shem Tov suggests a simple technique that can help withstand temptation.
He gave the parable of a king who wished to test the loyalty of his subjects. He summoned one of his officers and instructed him to go among the masses and attempt to incite a rebellion. By observing who acceded to this agitator, the king could gauge the loyalty or disloyalty of his subjects. One wise man approached by the instigator reasoned that it was unthinkable that so powerful a monarch would allow such a traitor to move about so freely. Hence, he concluded, the rebel must be acting with the king's consent, and his ultimate purpose was to test the loyalty of the populace. So the wise man immediately rejected the instigator.
Our recognition of God as a monarch, as the Absolute Ruler of the Universe, should make it apparent that any instigation to defy the Divine will is a test of our loyalty. Indeed, the evil inclination [
yetzer hara] is merely carrying out its mission to seduce us to sin, but since the
yetzer hara too is in the Divine service, it really does not wish us to submit to its seduction. Ironically, one who submits to the seduction of the
yetzer hara is not only transgressing the Divine will but even disappointing the
yetzer hara. It is like the diabetic who submits to his desire for sweets. Far from indulging himself, he is harming himself.

Today I shall ...... try to realize that nothing in the world can exist other than by the Divine will, and that anything that appears to be in defiance of the Divine will can only be a test

CHAG SAMEACH

-Divrei Chizuk-

Let's all be mispalel and say to Hashem

"PLEASE HASHEM

This Shavuos; Kabolas HaTorah!

shavuos

PLEASE

Bring us all HOME

to be together again

AS ONE NATION

Do it for Your sake,

Do it for the sake of Your Holy Torah You gave us

for we are all unworthy,

Remember Avraham Yitzchak & Yakov

Remember all what we have gone through over 3,000 yrs

ALL FOR YOU-

OUR FATHER, OUR CREATOR, OUR FRIEND

We are so lost with out YOU

SAVE US-SAVE US-

LET'S GO HOME''.

Thursday, June 2, 2011

HEY GUYS,

Hope you're all enjoying summer vacation so far.

I had the zechus this week to meet with a VERY special guy who started this organization called Am Segula... Am Segula is a non profit organization that will change the world. Using the drive of students and young adults with meaningful aspirations, it is our mission to give back to those who are in need. Because our unique and powerful life experiences we realize the importance of charity and the impact it has on the Jewish community. Only an Am Segula, a treasured nation, can revolutionize the world we live in.

How you can help:

With our multiple branches reaching out, we have the opportunity to impact others in many meaningful ways. Through Chagim for Chayaliim, The lone solder center, our unique connection with American Army bases, and many more programs, we have manifested our impact on the Jewish community.

I thought it would be an AWESOME SUMMER activity for us to get together and play dodgeball, and raise money for an amazing organization like this.

the date were aiming for is wednesday June 15Th!

I Know all these emails get annoying, but PLEASE email me back if youre interested in participating. and please feel free to forward to any other girl you think would be interested!

THANKS =)

Please contact Erin @ erinnweinreich@gmail.com

(Thank you Erin for all the chesed you do for Am Yisroel! and for planning this amazing event for us to take part in!)